First off as I write this... here's something to occupy your time...
You notice google maps has a street view function now? All I know, it was taken very recently... based on the cars outside my house...
Whew... anyway... back to Jury Duty Day 1:
That was close... the fact that I'm talking about my jury experience should be indication that I didn't make the jury (thank God). But it was really dicey there.
First off, they make you watch a video... with some lady that resembles Carolyn from the Apprentice (you know, the woman that Trump fired before replacing her with his own daughter, Ivanka). And there's this cheesy music playing that I can't tune out. It's hilarious. So they are showing all these interviews with people who have served on a jury. It's funny. There's this retired librarian... and some farmer... and some dental hygenist... and various other people. They ask some interesting questions that I've thought of at many times. But I tune it out. It's early and I'm really struggling to stay awake. But if the Simpsons should get any new ideas for new spoof documentary/instruction videos... here's an idea.
Then they do roll call... I feel like I'm in my US history class again...
"Here"
I always liked how my name was so easy to pronounce... and others had really hard names that get butchered all the time. It was really mean to laugh at the name "Dyckman" when it was mispronounced... but I was 16 at the time...
Then we get moved into the courtroom and have to raise our hand if we have problems with serving on a jury for an extended period of time. This was going to be a civil court case and was going to last 3-4 weeks, Monday thru Thursday. Holy potatoes!!!! Were they serious? The only saving grace was that it was going to be a nine person jury. But at this time, you really realize how your problems compare to everyone else. I mean, I have problems and issues I deal with every day. But some other people have lots and lots of other things they worry about. They have spouses that are disabled, some have kids that need day care, some have to travel 60 miles to get to the courthouse, and one poor poor soul had to add another chapter to a 1300 page dissertation when his consulting faculty just died from lung cancer and is 3 weeks behind schedule with 2 weeks to go to turn it in.
And then some person had to write an NIH grant.
"Can you get a extension" asks the judge
"Uh, sometimes... but not that much extra time" answers the person.
Sometimes your problems seem so insignificant.... because they could be worse. So this was the time for the first of many sidebars and after that, many people were excused.
Something I should also say... people were randomly placed in a random order and assigned seats... which included the jury box. I was in juror seat 7... of course I was... I was in seat 4 last time.... I really had to make sure I said something when asked various questions. If you don't say anything... they have no reason to doubt your decision making.
Then we find out this is a civil trial involving race discrimination... wow... that's a huge can of beans. The members are then asked if they were ever discriminated because of race or knew of a family member or friend in the same situation. This was then followed by questions about discrimination in general... which I piped up on (for a friend's situation way back in the past).
Or you getting bored yet?... because I wanted to scream "fire" because I was so bored.
Then we were each tested with a pop quiz; or essentially a quiz about ourselves (job, occupation, group memberships, hobbies, etc.)... and then we get to the funniest part of morning.
The lawyers ask us questions, but for a short amount of time and essentially towards all of the jury panel. First it was the plantiff representing the guy suing for monetary damages for discrimination. Now snap judgement... I was for this guy... he looked like a hard working guy, who got fired from his job. I felt for him... I related to him... but that was before his lawyer spoke. This lawyer... she talked about how we felt about awarding damages for discrimination, and if we could do it... or how it could be quantified.... suffering... really deep stuff. Personally, I had no problem with it... but then she asked a question or line of questioning that made the other lawyer object... yes object during juror questioning... We were talking about race and we were talking about discrimination. So what obvious question was going to be asked next?
"Does anyone not know about the OJ Simpson case?"
(groan ... that was me in my head)
"Does anyone remember the name Mark Fuhrman?"
(are you kidding me? did she just bring up Mark Fuhrman?... AAAUUGGHHH!!!)
I'll spare you the rest of this story, but the questioning got really disjointed and I can tell this was going to be an annoying trial... but I still felt bad for the plaintiff and what he might or might not have gone through.
Then I listened to the other lawyer ask questions... he asked about discrimination or intimidation from a previous employer and I spoke up.
Essentially, I was trying to make one set of lawyers hate me... or shed some doubt about whether or not I could be a good juror.
I couldn't help but get the feeling that I was in some reverse lottery... usually you want to get picked for something and when you do, you don't get it... but in a reverse lottery, you don't want to get it and in a pure and unadulterated form of Murphy's law, you get it anyway.
So after all the questions have been answered, the lawyers had yet another sidebar and we had to wait
and wait
and wait
and shuffling of papers
and wait
and then the lawyers starting handing rosters of jurors to each other
and then to the other lawyers
and back again
and back again
... after about an hour of watching the lawyers look up at each of us from their tables (after reading their rosters) and making some inaudible comment to each other, we all patiently waited to hear our verdict... whether or not we would be found .... fit... to be a juror.
and then the clerk got the form and the judge informed us that we would now be notified if we were jurors and if not, she thanked us in advance that our civic duty was appreciated.
So then the clerk got the list, and then on bated breath, we were waiting. And we waited... and waited and waited... and then she started typing something, and we waited.
(I've seen more suspense here than I ever did while watching American Idol)
Bottom line, when they did read the list, I wasn't on it... but of the people who were on it, about 7, were seated in the jury box with myself... (hence why I dodged the bullet)... and the 2 others were seated with the rest of the jury panel.
So I'm thankful... it could be a lot worse... but now I kind of want to know what happens.
Oh well...
I'm getting good at this... maybe I should teach a class. :)
LeeZy
Ah yes...
Jury duty. Now there have been countless stories of how much it sucks and ways to get out of it. But I'm not going to list them now. But I like to pontificate about what I expect to be a very boring day at the courthouse... and finally something to blog about... Hooray!
I mean... first off... I live in the East Bay of the Bay Area and yet I have to go to San Francisco to appear for jury duty. I thought it was a mistake... but apparently not. I have to waste gas, drive across the bridge, find parking (which is validated, thank God), and appear at 7:45 AM. That's really rough. Not to mention, having to get up even earlier than usual just to make it on time... It's going to be a long day. All for a civic duty... whatever...
But we shall see if I actually get selected to be on a jury. I have strong opinions on every subject. Especially on alcoholism... which was what the last case I almost got picked for. I mean I had some bad memories in college of very belligerent drunks which I don't care to relive. But it was almost 10 years ago but I will try to be impartial about everything... you have to be... because if you try to get out of it by being an ass, you will get thrown in jail.
For the record, I don't think I should be on any jury... I make an opinion in the first 10 minutes and pretty much can't be convinced otherwise unless someone helps me see the situation in a different way. And not many people are skilled in that.
Ha, then I found this link which might prove otherwise.
Well anyway, I'll try blogging about this as long as I'm involved. Let's hope it's not that long.
LeeZy
Hi again.
Been a little busy and just got back from a conference with the company. I've been a bit overwhelmed... but I hear you guys read this still... so I am happy to oblige with something.
But one thing has been on my mind lately. I've been surrounded with news of marriage, weddings, and engagements. It's on TV and it's going on in real life as well. And I don't seem to be able to dodge it.
And it has me feeling very confused and conflicted... as if the world is trying to tell me something... or rub something in my face. But luckily... I have this episode of Scrubs that was shown recently to make me feel a little better.
Scrubs - My Cold Shower Pt 1
Scrubs - My Cold Shower Pt 2
If you're familiar with the show... in this episode JD is coming to grips with his best friend getting engaged....
I sorta know what he's feeling... well not completely...
LeeZy
A great show... saw a handful of episodes so far...
All are quite excellent... some not for the squeamish... and most not safe for watching at work.... just so you know.... unless you can view pictures of breasts, penises, and others at work... and if you can... kudos to you... where do you work?
Bottled Water (very safe for work, just language as the others)
Pt 1
Pt 2
Pt 3
Circumcision (obviously not safe for work)
Wal Mart Haters (yup not this either, its got video of boobs! the horror!)Creationism (safe for viewing)
The Best (also safe)
There are plenty of these episodes on google video... check it out... search here....
And lastly a few more links to tide you over until I have time to write more...
This is a cool bet not to lose, but to watch... I can think of other songs to put on that mixtape as well... Ricky Martin, Sanjaya, anything by Bjork... Eddie Murphy... the list goes on...
Live Google earth?... Uh yeah... no thanks... I see enough weird stuff as is... btw... full episode of this Simpsons is here... I wish they chose another soccer player for the cameo... maybe Oliver Kahn?
The Meaning of Life... need I say anymore?
The only reason to go to Rodeo drive... is to watch the reaction to this...
Garfield... in real life...
"yes sir, your lasagna is coming"
And finally.... oh my goodness... do you have 30 minutes to waste... and like a little nostalgia trip? A good friend of mine showed me this clip that made her reminisce of her childhood in the UK. The closest thing I have to that is this... a bunch of 80s cartoon theme song openings to show you...
You're welcome...
LeeZy
Hi folks.
Quick post today... I read something that was pretty funny and thought it would be cool to include it here. I particularly like my commentary about one's life or career in the figurine above.
So... very... true....
Anyhoo... it's funny...
On a serious note, you should also read what this guy said about the Virginia Tech shootings... namely how this one newspaper said the guy was a specific ethnicity of Asian (it doesn't matter but he was Korean)
LeeZy
Did you miss me? Awww... I'm so touched. I guess some of you do really read this here blog. I know, I know... long time no write... I've been just trying to look for something write about and been coming up with nothing. And though I'm sure you all enjoy the links here... but eventually I like to write about something of substance. (Don Imus is one idea). But I got nothing right now, except for some links...
I've been trying to think of something to add to this Peep Show... I don't know how anyone can eat Peeps... it's basically all sugar and are kind of tough. But then again people would wonder how I can eat Krispy Kreme donuts... and I really don't want to but I just got to remind myself, it contains trans fats... not good for your health... I wish the vendor guy at work would bring more bagels.
So it's tax time. Now I don't want to go off on a rant or anything... but why are we paying taxes for nowadays? Is it really to make our lives better? Is it for the benefit of the country? Or is it to help bring more democracy to other countries? I really wonder.... UPDATE... here's how it's spent.
Did you know that rats laugh? I wonder if my friends who read this blog knew that. They must. They "play" with animals. But then again, this video does look like it was taken before many of my friends (and myself for that matter) were born. It's funny, I can hear the rats now....
"Oh please stop, please, sir, you're tickling me... stop it! What the hell is wrong with you... You PERVERT, quit it or I'll call the cops...!"
I want to do something like this on the windows at my workplace... it would look so damn cool. Supposedly we get a huge discount at Office Depot so it would work out...
I love Will Ferrell... I also love the movies he makes over and over...
I have a confession... I really loved the Borat movie. But I also found the Borat character really really annoying. Maybe it was because he was purposely acting like he was to see the reaction of the people he was bothering. So it just seems fitting when a Borat impersonator interviewed Borat so he could see what the whole entire country was subjected to..... uh... NICE!
You paying too much for rent? Find out here.
I really thought a skywalk on the Grand Canyon would be an eyesore but after looking at this video, maybe it would be pretty awesome. But I don't know it would be worth the 25 dollar entrance fee... I rather buy a bunch of canyon shot glasses for my little brother. And I just can't stop thinking about the physics of this structure...
It's fun just to read what some are damned for.
You watch 300 yet? It's pretty much a guy movie really... and it's done in the style of Sin City. It's a gladiator type movie really. I also heard that Anchorman is a funny movie. Guys love it, Gals don't like it as much as Will Ferrell's other movies. Now why, may you ask, am I bringing up these two movies? OH.... yeah....well... watch this trailer...
Dance your cares away.
Worry's for another day.
Let the music play.
Down at Fraggle Rock.
I only find this funny because I'm a little bit of a nerd and I hate home shopping network. Hey you! In the back... stop laughing at me... it's only OK if I call myself a nerd!
Harrummpph! Well then... until next time... hopefully it won't be as long as last time.
LeeZy
Hello everybody!
